If our self-preservation or our self-development is threatened, we defend our boundaries and react with anger we draw back in a motivated aggression and anxiety, depending on the normal narcissistic self-homeostasis. We can open up our fantasies of revenge and, also, why we did not act them out. Passive aggression must be seen and avoided.
With insight into one’s shadow, it is easier to fight, consider that we can be wrong in a situation, that we may well have reacted in an unfair way. Otherwise people can be totally convinced that they are right, the other one wrong – and in this situation, a fight cannot become constructive.